What is Valentine's Day

I remember as a kid, I loved Valentine's day. At school we made special boxes and everyone brought Valentine's for their classmates. But even then, there was an air of "I have someone and you don't". Remember the boy you had a crush on? He gave the snooty girl in class the best Valentine and the candy heart that said, "love" and "love bug", and you got the one that was blank? I remember that. It sort of hurt.

As an adult, my husband and I have had fun with the day. But never, ever did we expect diamonds or rolexes. And we always show each other we care in many different ways every day. Our anniversary was that special day to celebrate our love. 

I wonder how many people know that Valentine's day has it's roots in the Paegen festival, Lupercalia, that was dedicated to the Roman god of Agriculture, Faunus. It also celebrated Romulus and Remus, the founders of Rome. It was a festival of fertility that celebrated the Ides of February - roughly February 15.

It was the Catholic church that readjusted the celebration at the end of the 5th century. They deemed it Valentine's Day to celebrate the patron Saint, and centuries later it became associated with love and romance.

Now it seems to be a time to buy your romantic partner expensive gifts and cards and to go to fancy dinners in or out. But It's also a very sad time for some people. People who have no romantic partner, those who have lost them to separation or death. It is a devastating day for people that are already lonely.

Some people actually suffer from a temporary condition called takotsubo cardiomyopathy - or broken heart syndrome. It can be a life threatening condition because it makes people act irrationally.

People who suffer from depression can begin to feel unworthy of ever having love because they are alone now.

And all this is proven by the mere fact that suicide rates are highest around Valentine's day.

So what does all this bring me to? Let's change the trend!

First, let's make our significant other feel like they are the only person in the room with you - all the time. Leave little love notes or trinkets of hearts and love around the house for each other - all the time. You feeling a trend here. Yep. Don't save it for a day the benefits the card and jewelry companies. Use on a regular basis to benefit your relationship!

Second, celebrate Valentines day as a day of friendship. If you see someone who needs a friend, be that friend! Have friendship parties - everyone bring a valentine dish and sit around and eat together, laughing and having happy conversation. Studies have proven the laughter reduces stress and helps your heart. It also reduces the stress for people with depression and loneliness.

So go find a friend - or lots - Put your arms around them and give them a big hug. Then sit down and laugh and say "Happy Valentine's day- I love you!"